so in my earlier post i may have glossed over, somewhat, the releasing edgar thing. maybe i'm crazy, but i feel aweful about it. i took him out hoping that the other birds would accept him, but when he flew they mobbed him and knocked him down, to the ground and then into the tree, and continued to harrass him. when i had him on my hand i assumed that was it for the day and was taking him back to the car when he flapped into the tree. he is a pretty tame bird and i worry that without a group of other birds to learn wild behavior from he will starve or worse. i know this seems silly, but he was my pet, and i raised him from a baby. when he was in the tree he was hunched down in his "defensive/hiding" posture, he was scared, and when i shook the branch hoping he would fly to the ground, he took off, was mobbed, and i lost him. chances are he is in a tree hiding, and probably sleeping now. i went back to the cemetery and the park across the street from it 6 times since i let him go (around 2pm) and looked and listened but never saw him. plenty of crows, but they all flew too adeptly to be edgar. it has bugged me all day, and is now keeping me up. i feel horribly guilty. i want to believe that he will be fine, but i can't , and i know it is my fault. sorry this isn't a happy post with lots of pictures, but i wanted to get this off my chest.
4 comments:
A day of very mixed emotions. It's not easy being a parent sometimes, you always wonder if you've done enough. I'm touched by the post. D
I once had a squirrel that I raised from a baby. He was injured when our dog thought he was a toy, and I nursed him back from death. He was never the same...he could run but I could still catch him. We then moved and couldn't take him into California. It was October in the Midwest, so we took him out to an animal rescue farm to be kept safe and secure over the winter. Unfortunately, as a wild squirrel, he had other ideas. He escaped and ran up a tree, nevermore to be seen. I can't believe he survived the winter, never having learned to find his own food or escape from danger.
Your story makes me sad for Peanut too, but I realize that I took God's Plan into my own hands, and we both suffered the consequences. However, God's ultimate Plan is for our good, and I have to believe that He will take care of Edgar as He took care of Peanut. The lesson I learned is that we always need to recognize our dependence on His Wisdom in all that we do.
My sympathies to you and Edgar.
Thank you for your thoughts and support, i appreciate it. still looking, still nothing.
Hey Nate, from the time I read your blog yesterday and the time I am responding, you have been in my thoughts and prayers.
Raising pets and children is a very complicated task. Knowing they are dependent upon your care and judgments, trusting that you are "doing good by them." Being there in their time of need, yet not holding on so tightly to stifle growth and development. I must confess, I have regrets in some of my decisions, yet, as a Christian....a believer, I have faith that somehow, God will cover my sins, my mistakes, and will make it alright. Knowing I cannot change my past choices, I move forward in faith.
Today I was reminded of the old old song, "His Eye is on the Sparrow,...and I know he watches me!" I was told that there are just massive amounts of sparrows, compared to the quantity of other flocks. I don't know if it is true, but I do know, God made Edgar and I know He is able to take care of him and you! You have been a good "Daddy" to young Edgar. Chances are, he would not have lived this long had it not been your kind heart and good care for this helpless bird. You did what you believed to be the best for him. So, as your heart is broken with regrets and some "empty nest" feelings, by faith believe, "His Eye is on Your Crow...and I know He watches both of you!"
Faith is the key to move forward.
Trust God!
I am praying for both of you.
Mom
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