Two years since i started this blog.
well, being in a retrospective frame of mind, i must consider what i have learned in 30 years that i could pass on. the answer is, not much. there are lots of witty, snarky things i could throw out, there are hard learned lessons to be offered like halloween candy, but i am realizing that life is a trial and error thing. some people seemingly have easier tests than others, but we all make our own choices that shape who we become. some better than others.
There are days when i wish i could be Mark Quinn. My best friend is an incredible person, and a great, and loyal friend. From my vantage point he makes carefully considered deciscions, and plots his own course as smoothly and as practically as i can believe is possible. i have an enormous amount of respect for him, and his process. i HATE to make the inevitable comparison between our two disparate lives, but i do, usually late at night. i secretly wonder whether i have squandered my youth, whether i am too far behind to catch up to any semblance of equality with my peers. I wonder, in my days filled with an executive best friend, and a doctorate wife, if i will ever shake that flush of embarrassment that comes when introducing myself in social situations.
Don't misunderstand me, i have no shame in what i have done on an item by item basis. but the sum of my adventures does not have the same value as the parts. i am years away from having a career. maybe this is common among people at this age, but i thought i would be farther along by now. i will be able to run for president in 5 more years.
reflecting on my 30 years, in comparison with my closest friends, looks alot like the "goofus and gallant" portion of highlights magazine. i know that this perspective is skewed, slightly, but i must also admit that having such impressive people in my life is also sound motivation to try to catch up. and eventually i will reach the top of my own personal hill, build a nice little cabin and settle into a life and career there; but it is only by virtue of the internal bootstrapping i must do to play catch up to my illustrious friends. thank you for the help.
well, being in a retrospective frame of mind, i must consider what i have learned in 30 years that i could pass on. the answer is, not much. there are lots of witty, snarky things i could throw out, there are hard learned lessons to be offered like halloween candy, but i am realizing that life is a trial and error thing. some people seemingly have easier tests than others, but we all make our own choices that shape who we become. some better than others.
There are days when i wish i could be Mark Quinn. My best friend is an incredible person, and a great, and loyal friend. From my vantage point he makes carefully considered deciscions, and plots his own course as smoothly and as practically as i can believe is possible. i have an enormous amount of respect for him, and his process. i HATE to make the inevitable comparison between our two disparate lives, but i do, usually late at night. i secretly wonder whether i have squandered my youth, whether i am too far behind to catch up to any semblance of equality with my peers. I wonder, in my days filled with an executive best friend, and a doctorate wife, if i will ever shake that flush of embarrassment that comes when introducing myself in social situations.
Don't misunderstand me, i have no shame in what i have done on an item by item basis. but the sum of my adventures does not have the same value as the parts. i am years away from having a career. maybe this is common among people at this age, but i thought i would be farther along by now. i will be able to run for president in 5 more years.
reflecting on my 30 years, in comparison with my closest friends, looks alot like the "goofus and gallant" portion of highlights magazine. i know that this perspective is skewed, slightly, but i must also admit that having such impressive people in my life is also sound motivation to try to catch up. and eventually i will reach the top of my own personal hill, build a nice little cabin and settle into a life and career there; but it is only by virtue of the internal bootstrapping i must do to play catch up to my illustrious friends. thank you for the help.
2 comments:
see, nate, if *I* were your best friend, you wouldn't feel so dwarfed and goofus-ish because i'm not impressive at all. add that to your list as another advantage to me being your BFF.
in all seriousness, i think you're pretty impressive yourself, nate. you're a wonderful people-person, super caring, witty, and hard-working. happy 30th birthday! i hope it's a wonderful one for you.
Oh Nate,
You make a difference in people's lives! You are kind, loving, and caring!
Life is NOT what you do; it IS Who You Are and Who You Touch!
Our lives are better because of you! Ask any friend you have....life's better because of you! You reach out and find the most thoughtful ways to meet peoples' needs. I hope you find satisfaction in who you are.
YOU ARE FANTASTIC!
You are still becoming the man God called you to be...it is not in a career. Just show love (Christ) to people in need, you will be fulfilled!
So proud to be your mom!
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